Kalliel (kalliel) wrote,
Kalliel
kalliel

my afflictions, let me show you them (+ Fic Recs!)

So, this is the dumbest post of my life. But I've just been sittin' here, kinda doing schoolwork but really not, ignoring my Big Bang like a jackass and cautiously circling academic final papers.

But mostly, I've just been watching Supernatural S4. Of all the seasons, it's probably the one I've watched the least and the one I'm least familiar with. Don't ask why, I cannot answer that question.

Of course, upon rewatch, I really feel like I need to ask that question because I've marathoned ten (thousand) episodes at this point and this is all I see:


-- 4x01 grave-crawling Dean being all hoarse and thirsty and awwww
-- 4x02 Meg kicking the holy hell out of Dean on the ground, awwww; Henricksen heart-grabbing him awwww
-- 4x03 Dean telling Mary not to go into the nursery awwwww
-- 4x04 unconscious!Dean being slobbered over by rugaru guy awwww
-- 4x05 Dean with his poisoned!drink awww
-- 4x06 EVERYTHING AWWWWWW
-- 4x07 fine, I skipped this one. But candy-induced indigestion Dean awwww?
-- 4x08 e. coli Dean awwww. talking PTSD about Hell awwwww
-- 4x09 SPITTING BLOOD INTO SINK DISLOCATED!SHOULDER DEAN AWWWW
-- 4x10 that scene at the end, I guess, but ehhh. >.>
-- 4x11 idk I kind of stopped paying attention to write this post, but I think there's some kind of enclosed-space basement deal here that pings my fancy. Oh, also:

"He's outside."

"Well, why doesn't he come inside?"

"Because I had to carry him out."

<3333
-- 4x12 isn't there ceiling fan breathplay in this episode??

Don't worry--I am fully aware I am missing the point! The point is not what rewatch is for! And since we're on this ridiculous kick, some themed recs!

1. One of Us Will Die Inside These Arms by eschatologies. Dean, Sam, S2. Blood loss, shock.
Summary: Something about the duffle bag. Dean blinks again and Sam is gone. It’s not a great sign that he’s losing time like this.
Note: Eschatologies writes the most sublime h/c descriptions, she really does. They're the kind that make me dwell in them and soak a bit, then go back and re-read five million times. And on top of that? She tells a damn good story.

2. Whiskey Wracked by puchuupoet. Dean, Sam, peripheral John. Pre-series (teen). Alcoholism, daddy issues.
Summary: He looks too old this way. Sam grabs Dean's wrist, the one holding the empty bottle.
Note: Beautiful, simple, and simply beautiful.

3. holding on to what I haven’t got by alwaysenduphere. Dean, Sam. S1/2 AU. [Choose not to disclose. Trigger warning.]
Summary: It makes you sad that Dean's not here to see it but you know he'd be ridiculously proud. He'd pull out a 100-watt smile so rare and so bright it'd light up even the darkest of nights.
Note: I don't normally read fics with this topic; there's just lines between RL and fandom that I don't like getting close to. Sooo admittedly I initially read this because the summary mentioned gen bed-sharing. I ended up with a whole lot more. It was worth it. ♥

4. Losing My Religion by vie_dangerouse. Sam, Dean. S3. Cough, fever, pre-Hell angst.
Summary: maybe somewhere in that fever-daze, Dean can live in that world constructed of dreams and held together by spit and subverted prayers and forget.
Note: Vie love of my life Vie~ This fic tends into things that are so ethereal, so sentimental, that elsewhere would make power lose out to vagueness. The result is downright gorgeous. Schmoopy and still so sad.




Also, I finally cut into the Impala brownie. Slicing it up was probably more traumatizing than it should have been. I had the grill and part of the hood on a plate and I was like aaaahh oh goddddd D;. It tasted like crumbly rocks, but M&Ms were involved, so I call it a win.
Tags: fandom recs, fandom: spn, i can't watch tv like a normal person
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