November 17th, 2013


Where have you been all my life, Bed?

Dear Sam,

It's okay that you don't find the Batcave his bastion of all things that are good in life because let's be real my opinion of it is even lower than yours. And I sympathize with your bedding issues. But my advice for you is this. A house (or abode, or antiquated underground bunker with all kinds of deadly secrets inside it) isn't a home unless you work to make it that way.

What you need to do, then, is make your bed awesome enough to be deserving of your love!

Case in point. I moved into my current residence a little under three months ago. I slept in my bedroom for the first time on Friday. (I'd been sleeping on my couch, because I'd been roadtripping for the two weeks prior and sleeping in a sleeping bag, and previous to that sleeping on a couch at my father's house for a month, so I was just kind of like, fuck it, whatever. XP)

But then! I finally made my bed awesome, and I love it very much, and it's possible I may never leave it:

And yes, I love my pillows very much. Though for purposes of color coordination Dean might be exiled to the living room, with the other green things.

And while these are probably not as interesting as the pillows in the foreground, I made these ones!

In intentionally complementary colors and patterns. I highly recommend making your pillowcases out of repurposed flannel shirts, because they have pockets, where you can ninja away convenient Kleenexes, Post-It notes, whatever else you need in bed and never have. Also, flannel shirts make it really easy to sew in a straight line because LOL THE FABRIC IS ALREADY LINED, HOW AWESOME IS THAT.

Though I must confess, my favorite part about this bed is neither set of pillows, but the comforter. It's rated to provide warmth in European farmhouses with poor insulation and no heating systems, and it is amazing.

In short, this bed is my way of saying: Fuck you Michigan, I win!

So, dear Sam, I reiterate: You too can make yourself an amazing bed. Because as my Bible always says, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHETHER YOU WIN BY AN INCH OR A MILE. WINNING IS WINNING.*

* Vin Diesel is my Bible. His Apostles are called the Fast and Furious movie franchise.

That being said, having so expertly boxed fandom out of my life for the purposes of RL business, I'm having some trouble nesting. …Despite the brevity of my absence from fandom. XP So what are you thinking abut right now? What are you working on? Anyone wanna talk S9? Or talk fanworks? What's up in your neck of the woods? Talk to meeee. <3
free fall

SPN S9 Fic Recs!

S9 fic recs! I haven't read very many of these, because time passes a lot more quickly than I am on board with, but here are three that I've really enjoyed so far.

An Ancient Hymn to Love by fannishliss
Genre: character study, metaphysical
Characters: Death, April Kelly, Reapers
Rating: G
Word Count: 1800
Spoilers: Through 9x03
Summary: In the beginning, Death as well was there, the darkness against which God created light. And there was light, and the evening and the morning were the first day. And Death saw that it was good.

I love the insertion of Death into the familiar origin story--and the way it works as a refrain throughout the narrative. The way this fic puts forth the ever-presence of Death is just fantastic, both as a devastating force (as evinced in the loss of April's parents) as well as a tangible source of strength--as evinced in April herself. In both narrative and narration, as like Death steps forward just enough that we can see him, see his workings in places that would otherwise have been invisible.

It's April Kelly's exegesis, wrapped into a retelling of the Biblical origins of the world, reinscribing Death into the story of Life. What's not to love?

Sh$% Dean says by counteragent
Genre: drabble, twist ending
Characters: Dean, Sam
Rating: PG
Word Count: 150
Spoilers: Through 9x01, takes place at some point later in S9.
Summary: Dean’s non-sequiturs are getting weirder, Sam thought.

counteragent says it best; in the comments she notes her desire to explore that moment when a secret becomes so embedded that it's partly that you will not tell it--and mostly that you can't. In the briefest of words, this is that fic. But don't be put off by the word count--every syllable is double-edged and poised to kill.

A tiger by its tail by counteragent
Genre: slash, horror, mindfuck, and…is fantastic bar ambience a genre?
Pairing: Dean/Sam
Characters: Dean, Sam, Ezekiel
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~2800
Spoilers: Through 9x01; takes place (much) later in S9.
Summary: Dean hasn't been drunk in a long time. He and Sam haven't done this in a long time, either.

If you're the sort who occasionally speed-reads or skims fic--and I confess, sometimes I do--my advice for this one: SLOW. DOWN. It's worth every moment. Hot as hell, saucy, a little muddied; it's all the love and comfort and normalcy you've ever wanted, without taking the edge off of anything. There's a moment where Dean feels--and this is his word--"cherished." And yet--and yet.

The real horror of this fic isn't found in gothic tropes, or deprivation, or the sort of dead-pan darkness and blood and toil typical of the genre. Or even in the more pristine, reserved moodiness of other horror stories, the ones that hold things back, invite terror into empty spaces. This fic gives--and in so doing, makes you realize how very much there is to lose. (Or how much has already been lost.)


In other news, I'm having one of those bizarre moments where I want to flee from all of my responsibilities--here meaning the fandom ones, not the RL ones. The RL ones go without saying. XD But that's silly, because I don't have any fandom responsibilities, since it's all…voluntary. idk I just feel like I should be doing things for HT's themed week like post recs or clips and such--all things I planned to do; planned to do, in fact, every day of the themed week and failed to do for all of them. Because I don't really feel like it, and I'd rather just write non-HT fic. WHICH SHOULD BE TOTALLY OKAY. It is totally okay; objectively, I know that.

But it still makes me feel like a bad mod. :\
free fall

SPN Fic Recs That AREN'T For S9!

ALL THE FIC RECS. I'm in a ~mood, okay. Forgive me! The title of this batch is "Not S9 Fic Recs." Or, alternatively, "highly variegated but equally perceptive explorations of Sam and Dean at entirely unrelated points in their respective lives." Primarily gen, also includes Dean/Castiel and Sam/Amelia. Spans chronologically from pre-series to early S8.

1. The World Was Saved by septembers_coda
Genre: hurt/comfort (Dean), angst, post-5x22 tag!fic
Characters: Dean, OFC
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,800
Summary: Lisa can’t risk letting Dean stay when he comes to her after Sam went to Hell, so now Dean is alone. Dean has lost his love, his brother, and everything he ever had, and his grief is the one monster he can’t defeat.

I adore what this fic does with the idea of loneliness, touch. There are talking cures and fucking cures but I don't know that I've ever seen straight-up touching and it's done so, so beautifully here. Re: S5/6 my heart rate generally just surges because abandonment, loneliness-these aren't good things for Dean and even more so then.

There's a scene in this fic where Dean is checking himself out to see if he was presentable enough post 5x22 to go into a massage place that I just love--the detail of it, the realism. And the whole rest of this fic is painful in the best of ways--the desolation doesn't go away, and the general situation doesn't really change in the end, but something does. Something very much changes. It kind of reminds me of people who will hug pillows in the absence of their spouse. It changes nothing but it matters anyway.

2. Respect by brightly_lit
Genre: gen, angst, h/c, teen!chesters
Characters: Sam, Dean, John, OMC hunter
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~3,800
Summary: John sends a very unwilling 14-year-old Sam with Phil, one of John's hunter buddies, to help him kill a werewolf. When things don't go as planned, Sam has to rely on himself and what he's been taught to try to pick up the pieces. Sometimes life with Dad and Dean seems pretty great by comparison.

I love the disjuncture between Sam and Dean at the beginning of this, where their age difference is at just that point there it's hit that striking note of dissimilarity, to say nothing of their different relationships with hunting in general. Even as he spends most of this fic apart from them, this fic is about Sam's shitty home and his domineering father and his jerkoff brother, both of whom he loves very much, and both of whose respect he misses. This fic just has a magnificent sense of balance that I really value and enjoy. And Sam's narration here, his perceptivity, is just stellar. Ladies and gentlemen, Sam. Winchester. <3

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