February 7th, 2015



* Not that much content on this journal was locked or filtered in the first place, but let the record show that I've made a commitment to keeping everything OPEN here, no exceptions. (Everything presently locked will remain locked, because I am lazy.)

I figure if I'm not comfortable with literally anyone having the ability to stumble across it, then it probably shouldn't be on the Internet, period. It ain't that secure. This is in an effort to better align my spaces, within and without.

* Plus I spend 70% of my time regretting things I say, do, or write regardless of whether they were fully public or in private interaction, so it's not like privacy is a particularly useful concept anyway!

* I'd also like to not do that anymore. Because man, if guilt and regret were foods, they'd be at the big, fat bottom of my pyramid. And for the most part I feel like this is unwarranted, because it's not like I've committed any war crimes!

* Plus you're all probably sick of wondering wtf is up with Kalliel and her dog--or more precisely, sick of having to hear about Kalliel and her dog, because my god, does she not realize that people are dying, regime are being overthrown, or failing to be overthrown, etc. Talking incessantly about her makes me feel guilty because I know I'm being ridiculous and melodramatic, but not doing that also makes me feel guilty because we're the only ones in the world who will; and she's missing, not dead, so if we don't then we're damning her.

* It also makes me feel very guilty when I'm posting here but not reading my flist, because that is really not the point of fandom, or community writ large, but I haven't seen 10x10, 10x11, or 10x12, and I am COMPLETELY 100% UNSPOILED FOR 10x13 (and beyond), like a hundred percent a hundred percent, and I desperately want to keep it that way!! So I am trying to keep away until I get caught back up.

* But then I realized that since I am behind anyway, perhaps this would be the best time to catch up on things I should have written literally over a year ago and haven't yet, like my fics for fandomaid (which have been started and restarted multiple times at this point, because every time I start writing them in earnest some ridiculous calamity happens IRL and I never feel like picking up where I left them afterwards), and my piece for tricycleman.

Because S10 is magnificent and absurdly distracting, such that whenever I am caught up I have no room for any interests but the immediate canon, which is not helpful. XD

* But THEN I haven't really written anything in over two months, because December was full of anxiety and weird dissociation, and then after that finally broke Lily went missing. So writing, how does that work? And how do you make it NOT SUCK? So there's a hurdle to jump before writing gifts for people, before catching up with Show, before catching up with LJ, etc. etc. etc. Which I definitely know should not be distressing, but it feels that way anyway.

* In an effort to basically try to stop being a ridiculous person and fleeing at the scent of anything remotely resembling a word, creative or otherwise, I will probably be making liberal use of the tag on this journal, i use lj the way other people use tumblr If you would like to be spared this tripe (and I do mean tripe), PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE blacklist this tag!

You can do so by going to LJ's homepage, hovering over the horizontal nav option "Friends," and scrolling down to "Add or Remove." The final column lists an option for your to choose which tags you follow/don't follow on a given journal.

* On the plus side, school is going well. I have a full prelims exam committee as of last night, I got to meet Chang Rae Lee, and Environmental Law is my favorite subject ever. I am studying for our first exam and I am loving every minute of it. Why isn't everything like this?