Kalliel (kalliel) wrote,
Kalliel
kalliel

Life Expectancy

I know it's wrong for this to be funny, and it were anyone else it totally wouldn't be, but because it's a Winchester it's really, really funny I'm sorry. And to clarify, it's mostly the driving stat that I find funny.

My friend was playing with a Life Expectancy website, which asks about your family's health history, your income, years of education, occupation, personal health habits, and sources of stress and spits out a number for you. Rather than do mine, because putting your stats through an online form is pointless, I figured I might as well do Dean's. And this is with the 'Occupation' field marked as "Other (manual labor)":





If I weren't a complete bastard, this would be really sad, but IT'S JUST REALLY FUNNY OKAY.

DO YOU SEE THAT NUMBER.

IF YOU DO NOT DRIVE, YOUR LIFE EXPECTANCY WILL BE 30.72 YEARS LONGER.

Basically, kids, always wear your seatbelt, never drive inebriated, and drive only as fast as the conditions of the road safely allow. You may also want to avoid driving if the weather forecasts smoky glowing demon hoardes in your neighborhood. It may also help your lifespan if the person inputting your data doesn't put 99999 for the number of miles you drive in a year. But it's only been four episodes and Sam and Dean have already crossed the country at least twice, so...

This really shouldn't be as uproarious as I'm finding it right now, but I just spent all day ricocheting back and forth between two different symposia, so bear with me.

/but aren't you proud Dean I save all my sadism for YOU

[But then of course I had to do Sam...]
Sam's:




Sam, you might want to get out of that car??
Tags: fandom: spn, kalliel is a creeping creeper, salt being a spirit deterrent, unapologetic hit-and-run
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