Kalliel (kalliel) wrote,
Kalliel
kalliel

Adventures in A03 Masterlisting

I wish AO3 a slow and painful death. And I think it knows it, because it can't possibly pull this shit with everyone else and not incite riots. And I say this as someone who made it through LJ's era of DDOS attacks. XP I don't understand why it takes so damn long to spool to having posted something, and I don't understand why backdating works only works sometimes. >:(

BUT I finally made it back through S8! Which I guess really just means I'be backdated everything I wrote during S9 and S10, because I only wrote four things for S8 in the first place.

So this post isn't entirely be offering up yet more AO3 rage, though, I must say that despite the fact that I didn't write anything for S8, I certainly made the most of what I did:

- I wrote an entire fic about a dude who appeared in the background of the title card of LARP and the Real Girl

- And an entire fic about Meg Masters bitching about her life with Meg and Meg 2.0's consciousness

- AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, AN ENTIRE SCENE THAT IS LITERALLY ABOUT DEAN WATCHING DR. SEXY. In the middle of what is actually a serious fic, to boot.
"Death?" says Andreas, the son of an independently wealthy hotel manager. He has coiffed hair and wears a suit that looks basically like Dean's, except it's supposed to be nicer because he's the son of an independently wealthy hotel manager. Sort of like Dean's is supposed to be nicer because he's a federal agent. And shit, you know it's bad when even you can tell how much of a fraud you are.

Andreas owns it, though. He's dying of four rare diseases, so after he has last night on earth sex with Dr. Flugelhorn (okay, so this isn't Dr. Sexy's greatest season ever, even Dean admits) he lies down in his hospital bed in its private room and, crowned by the moonlight streaming in from the window (the lucky bastard), soliloquizes.

"Death?" says Andreas.

"Death?" says Andreas.

"Death?" says Andreas.

"Jesus christ," says Sam.

"You can tell he has a boner in this shot," says Dean, and rewinds again. "Look."

"Death?" says Andreas.

"Death?" says Andreas.

"Jesus christ, Dean," says Sam, and leaves the room.


On the whole, I am not enjoying this masterlisting thing very much, and it's mostly not AO3's fault. It's not even the tediousness of it. It's just very depressing going through thousands and thousands and tens of thousands of words that are mostly pointless. Except for that excerpt above, obviously, which is totally pointed.

Like, jesus, I need a new hobby. (But I'm not going to go find one.)
Tags: fandom: spn, get off the computer jesus christ
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