Kalliel (kalliel) wrote,
Kalliel
kalliel

14x09 "The Spear"

Michael is such a weirdo, omg. XP IF GOD THOUGHT LUCIFER HAD ISSUES, DID HE EVER CHECK ON HIS OTHER SON.

I love that over the course of these nine episodes, Michael has the same "oh, I'm not God, but uhuhuhu you're close" conversation with like three different entities, and he
drinks
that
shit
up
every single time. Like, he does his soft chuckle, and then he all but flutters his garden fan coquettishly like OH I BLUSH but it's also obvious he wants them to say it so, so badly. It's not even that he desires to be called God, or to be God (like Castiel in S7, or Metatron). He just likes the flattery. Because I mean like, if he really wanted to take Heaven over, they'd probably just give it to him. (Uh, not that I don't see why he wouldn't want it. The remainders of the angel garrison are pretty pathetic and probably not stimulating company.)

AND THEN IN 14x09. HE'S ALL ANNOYED THAT IT'S TAKING FTW 2.0 SO DAMN LONG TO GET TO HIS PENTHOUSE. XDDD Michael pacing around his stupid penthouse and squirming in his chair and making a point of getting in position to sip his liquor from his crystal tumbler is so hilarious to me. I honestly expected him to wait around, pointedly staring at the view, so that he could turn around dramatically when TFW 2.0 once entered the room. And he calls Dean squirmy. Like, the flesh was literally falling from Nick's body and Lucifer was like "this is fine" but Michael?? He's like "Dean as a vessel was wiggly so I thought maybe I'd get him dry cleaned and he'd fit better, weh."

AND HE'S SO PROUD OF HIMSELF. He's like bwahaha I made a monster army and I left a way back into my true vessel and did any of you see this coming?? Eh???? And if Sam weren't scandalized by losing Dean again he might have had the presence of mind to think, well, yes. Yes, we saw all that coming, but the real question I have is, ummm. Why did you make this all so complicated? Why the monster experimentations (which Eve did first?)? The finding the hungry monsters (which Eve also did first)? The amassing army? Technically Azazel already tried that. But Michael thinks he's really cool and is super dedicated to letting everyone know how cool he is (even the Santa hat werewolf guy was like, yo... why did we just kill everyone to take over this penthouse lol) and Michael was like BECAUSE I'M REALLY COOL, even though literally no one was impressed and all it really meant was TFW had to run up a bunch of flights of stairs and be late to the soiree.

Even TFW doesn't necessarily respect Michael, though maybe they do moreso than anyone else, because they're familiar with the pomp and circumstance of Apocalypse stuff. They're just like, well. I'm tired and confused, but now I'm armed, soooo.

Michael's really not that different from Kip. They both need the glamor and glory, even though Michael likes acting like he's above all that. If Michael just got his shit done without needing to orchestrate his elaborate gotcha moments, play with his food, yadda yadda he'd have taken this rock over long ago. But he doesn't really want a better world; he wants someone to notice he wants a better world.

Which, I mean. In that way, maybe Michael should be looking to draw on more of Dean's influence rather than seek less of it. Because as much as sharing space with Dean is probably very tiresome and slow-going (so much brother drama Michael is absolutely not invested in, so much impenetrable but largely generalized and illogical guilt), when Dean hits that point of like, 14x03 or 13x20 (which also involved an Archangel and heading to a penthouse with a special pointy weapon, actually), at least he's, you know. Directed. XD

Michael wants to raze the earth and re-create it in his image, but he wants everyone to know his image before he kills them all and they cease to matter. This conundrum makes for very slow world-ending. He's used to people writing books about this stuff. In fact, he's used to people orating about this stuff, passing down stories bound by familiar conventions so that they can be remembered, recited, reified.

But instead he gets to deal with hunters, who don't get paid, don't get thanked, and in spite of Sam's absolute best efforts putting together his Cone World Brigade, don't even write shit down. He's been targeting hunters with his monsters (according to Djinn Guy), but by and large they don't go missed, don't go mourned. He's been in this world a full half-year and all he's done is conduct a confusing census, play with this science fair project, and covet Kansas City, and hardly anyone has taken notice. Even the Winchesters only paid attention to him for 33% of the last few months, and 20% of that was really just Sam paying attention to Dean. Michael doesn't have any playmates here; just minions.

It's lonely and boring at the top. He wants the spectacle!! The glory!!! But no one is equipped to give it to him so he's just chillin', settling for dunking on Dean and never letting Kaia finish her beans. The whole reason he came here is because he ran out of things to do in Cone World! Maybe he should've tried Jurassic Park.
Tags: fandom: spn, spn x
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